I tried to do that however; I found myself getting depressed, moody and becoming someone I refuse to be. there is a buildup some where where tension is making him seem very low. For the first two and a half years I have been very happy with him and he and I both have talked about marriage and children and are in the market to buy our first home together.However the past few months I have noticed several changes..Our main source of argument has often been how much time he has spent with his friends but for quite some time he had settled down and we were really living like a happily married couple. Hey anonymous, my friend is going through the same kinda thing. I did look at his recent calls and didnt find number. BIG FLASHING SIGN HERE ChEaTiNg cHeAtInG! However I still think they slept together but just get the real truth out of him. He didnt battle in the sense of ups and downs, he was always fairly calm. Its come to the point they are stealing my clothes knowing I dont have much that fits me do to weight loss from stress and nerves being shot. This is fact! I have a cheating husband, we are separated and getting a divorce. So I blocked her and him and I fought. We both have had infidelity issues in the past but we have worked on them and moved on. He never really says he loves me or goodnight or good morning and when I confront him about it he apologizes, says hell change it, but does nothing and still ignores me. i just completed my first degree programme and i am so shy to tell anyone these problems cos my dad felt i was rather getting married way too early.i feel like i should go back to my dads house but i cant because my marriage ceremony was just the talk of town. I in therapyAs far as I know the wife still with him, knowing he cheats. Husbands arent appreciated at home, so they cheat. A lucky man will find a woman with possibly a good foundation, good direction, an abundance of commitment, and good values and then put that all at risk to have an affair or try something they consider natural? Im 24 and im a male. Its hard to know if you should confront your husband about lying about cheating, or just accept what he says. Or he wouldnt be working in counseling to work things out! It seems he doesnt want to be intimate to me emotionally and physically. I feel like I have gone insane. The hook up well. Part 2: Not Getting It. However, before we dive into these steps, its important you read the next few sentences carefully. If the gym isnt your thing, even a walk outdoors or joining a yoga class can really help to clear your mind. What a douche! https://theadventurouswriter.com/quipstipsrelationships/steps-when-confused-about-relationship/. I asked her if he would be willing to do counseling. Tonight I literally felt sick to my stomach because he wont even sit by me or look me in the eye. I am not say you should wait and suffer more atleast seek advice at Marriage counselling offices before you act. the problem is I cant tell him what I know because then he will know that I snooped, so I am praying that God will reveal all. I found out he had been texting and seeing a 24 year old girl. At least you don't have kids with this lying, non-remorseful, s.o.b. Im hurt, disrespected, ashamed, embarrassed and my self esteem is so low. I got to follow up 2 weeks after and doctor said I was clear. He said this girls relatives were there and they spoke for 15 minutes or so. He said he emailed her afterward telling her I found the picture and they would not be contacting or emailing anymore. If your husband isnt willing to be honest with you or perhaps even try marriage counselingthen maybe thats all the information you need. I wish I wasnt drawn to him because I enjoy our emotional conversations. I knew it but didnt want to believe my marriage was over. If you need help, let me know. In the fallout from the first lie, I removed him from my Facebook relationship status. His login Id is his nickname tattooed on both arms. We both work in a federal prison and that is how we met. He blames me too that I dont trust him so that why he lies. Thank you for being here it takes alot of courage to share how things are going in your marriage. Love yourself! Yes, it will be hard to leave. I said theres no excuse why ur texting her, if she wont leave u alone why are you texting her? She told me that he had slept with a 15 year old on her living room floor I havent said anything yet but I believe it to be true should u keep quiet so I can keep calm for babys sake or should I just come out with it allthrough my relationship my partner has lied to me and flirted with other girls. if he got fired from his job, and didnt tell you, thats the same. Said how shed love to have him as a partner. Any advice? Then 4 days ago i received our cell phone bill in the mail and we had been charged overage charges due to too many text messages. For some couples, insights like this are just what they need to see the truth about cheating! May God give you peace, strength, and even joy as you walk forward into the next stage of your life. But sounds like he really does love you, and your marriage might work out for better. He tells me he cant keep doing these daily talks because he has told me everything and doing so will hurt our relationship further. Or you may decide that the relationship is not worth risking your happiness and decide to find someone better. Bottom line. NOT his typical behavior so now it has me wondering. She even went as far as confirming it. How do I get over this? The more testosterone a man has, the more likely he is to cheat. It can do two things: Make him nervous and cause him to burp the truth. He cannot give of himself. Because all hes done sence we been together is lie to my face. It is not ok he is treating you like this! Its no wonder he had an emotional affair with his cousin (and possibly a physical one too.). To the outside world I am the luckiest women to have such a wonderful husband but the truth is that since 2009 we have barely held it together. !.Last night we had another fight and I relised that this is never going to change. He later (about2-3 weeks) told me it was nothing serious. He gets mad if I bring her up, still denies it, and wont discuss it period. Get psychologial help. He Denies it and try to cover it up . I feel for you, stay safe. Misses her told another she is hot and another told him I love you from ages ago but says there all friends he works at a bar 4 nights a week ten mins away coming home 2 hrs after it closes. At first, when I caught him, he dismissed the . Hello ladies, whatever you do, think, feel or say, give yourself a moment to realize whats important in the grand scheme of things., and thats for you to stay emotionally strong and healthy. I just dont get as upset like I used to because of his inability to give me emotional intamacy. But he makes me coffee and has it ready every morning, leaves me notes on the bathroom mirror and makes sure all of my needs are met. Thinking that I had known everything now and maybe we could be stronger, I married him. Ive been the other man numerous times. What do I do now.?. During these 2 years we were still fooling around. Its sad the authorities only think he wants to see his son and that I must be the problem since he was beating me. I found out by looking at his phone logs, in hindsight I knew something was wrong but never this! My prayer for you is that you find the resources you need to move past your husbands past. He moved her in paying for her house.just next door to us! My advice to you is leave him alone. he feels he was perfectly justified, and finds it absolutely unacceptable that i dont accept that he communicated with her at all hours, that he kept things a secret, that he ran off to meet her whenever she demanded etc etc. Please let me know what you think, on that article or here. Like when we have financial issues he sits me down and always reassures me that we will make it through it. i have closed my old one, but he hasent even added the family and friends he wants to. Help? I dont want to wake up to anymore pain that they think is fun and games. My husband dosent show me the attention that he used to and I spend hours in the gym keeping fit and healthy while he slobs out on the couch wathcing golf! Can you live with him as he cheats on you? Hi Mspinkstuff, I feel the same with you. You always have known that in some form or another, he cheated but you stayed. i have been married for four years now, my husband cheated on me once.. things change now we worked it out.. but i notice hes always interested in online porn than me..he loves me n i love him very much i told him what is doing hurts me but he wont stop its like hes addicted to it please help!!! Only you can answer those questions. If a man is dirty enough to cheat on you.. We are together today and he thanks me for saving him and our marriage (which he was wanting to scrap get a mediator and divorce. He does not value your marriage AT ALL. I had three babies asleep in the house. The counselor suggested he write her a letter telling her she was a big mistake, that he woukd not protect her ever, and that she was never to contact him again. Wow Christine. This will help you work through any emotional baggage you might have otherwise brought into a future relationship and help you trust men again in the future. He has made pictures by taking real life people and searching the internet and putting real people on nude bodies. I do not agree with the emotional and defensive reaction when you accuse him of cheating. Everytime she comes picks up the kids, these feelings come up. Mabel i would be moving on with my life. Before you learn how to confront a cheater, prepare yourself for the obvious: The majority of cheating spouses will deny-deny-deny cheating until they are blue in the face. There is an instinct within us that drives us to procreate with different partners because that results in successful dispersion of our genes. He wont. Its not rejection, its not guilt The guy is a cheating liar. That is, if you and he have never (or rarely) fought about anything, then you dont know how to deal with something as big and scary as cheating. Stay strong!! Any advice would be appreciated! Youve caught him cheating three times. I am still in shock as we never even had a fight. I just recently went on my husbands app purchases and found multiple free text and calling apps that he has downloaded and a flirty emoji app that he had downloaded. Maybe your fiance doesnt want to or cant settle down. Obviously, the connection between the two of you is suffering. So 3 months later, I moved out of state. I can tell you every word you wrote resonated with me. We had almost no physical intimacy (holding hands, kissing, etc) 4. If your husband hadn't cheated with this woman it would have been another woman. It sounds a bit crowded, which is difficult for any relationship. Whats your thoughts? He stared me in the eye but wouldnt. And he grinned and said she had knee surgery and he had called to see how she was doing. If you think hes lying to you, then he probably is. Mine never did, and thats what kills me.. argh, My boyfriend of several years moved in with me but i always had a feeling something was wrong. They left together and I am certain they met up at times while I was stuck at work. I cant predict if your husband will cheat on you, or lie to you. I dont have all the answers, but I do have a few tips! You can do it. I was the one that felt we should wait to move in together, but he insisted we shouldnt wait, he was looking forward to our life together. She brought him baked goods, if one was working and one was not they called each other even while on vacation. He claims that they only had lunch and that if he ever did sleep with her or had taken their relationship to a physical level he would not continue our marriage. We first met through a mutual friend. Be prepared for lies, although if he wants to save his marriage, he should be prepared to tell you the whole truth. Maybe that is why he tooked advantage of me. Thats for yourself and for your children, if any. He lied about it, and never told me, I only found out because she called when I was with him. Hes not very affectionate and he can go months without having sex with me. He cheated many times on his previous women while in relationships. I wanted to believe, because i LOVE this man. (I can hear the douche snoring). My husband denied it, said I was crazy and he would never cheat on me. Need advice! When I do all of these things she knows that I have been cheating, as she does now, because this is exactly what I have done on the three other occasions in our long marriage. He doesnt care to ask for my work schedule to see if we can hang out nor does he make any efforts to hang out. Sweet Pea, It gives me some comfort knowing I not alone. So I dont know if he is cheating on me or not, I know my details suck and I probably left some important things out but can you at least tell if I am being overly paranoid or not? HELLO. Ive been selfish and I feel sorry for this women. WRONG second marriage I now have a 9 month old daughter with him. He always denied,Iam really sick and tired his way. Either that, or he has joined a hook-up site and has found a married woman in which to have these trounces with. He says he cant be having an affair because hes home everynight. Im now 49. If he has performance anxiety in the bedroom, he may be more likely to be unfaithful in marriage. Im in constant pain. He says he isnt interested in any of the women where he is and he tells me he has learned his lesson. 2 weeks ago when I was visiting him he said I should look for an apt. I dont know you, but YOU DESERVE TO BE TREATED WITH RESPECT!!! Complete access to everything the minute I found out. Leave him. Once when i was on the bus ride to meet him *im from florida and i moved to Va to be with him* in NC and with some girl of a dating website. Although sex has never been a problem between us. We had bbqs at each others houses, bonfires, and they went out on our boat with us, 1 time she even brought her kids whom my husband payed a lot of attention too. I am not buying things I dont need. My last therapist said to me toward the end of one of the last sessions Tom, you already have all the answers.you just need to look within. Hi, im mindy im 19 and a newlywed we have been married for 3 months now, during the short period of time there has been phone calls from girls From chat lines and hes lied to me about this one girl on Facebook sayin shes a lesbian but yet he messages her saying whats up wit ur sexy a$$? We hadnt had sex for three weeks and that night we had sex. I am in a relationship with this guy for 7 years he recently start cheating on me. He will beat you down so bad emotionally, you will feel so helpless!!! A few times, late night. you want proof that your husband is not cheating on you? Here are 5signs your husband is cheating, plus 4ways to know if hes lying to you about the affair. He said I wasnt paying attention to him etc. I want to find out if he slept with her but dont know how to go about it. As he walks away he tells me to think about it. Soooo, you can simply tell him that you love him and that you are aware of the affair Ask him to please end it and hope that he does. Hell keep cheating and lying until he decides to leave you. Is it that he is bored with me and cant connect? Ive been with my husband for 23 years and in the last few years 2 women have contacted him on facebook saying hes the father of their kids. He is ALWAYS ACCUSING of different things but wen i ask him he gets mad and defensive. Take this quick quiz that looks at whether he actually likes you or not! Much prayers and good luck!! His name might be on the deed but it was his that choose to cheat, so it should also be him that goes to stay in a hotel. We I confronted him once he was very defensive and said he would never cheat on me. now that I look back on things that happened, I realize he may have been cheating on me the whole time. Be vulnerable. Also last year I found another conversation with another one of his co workers that he was trying to hangout with ( a girl) and was telling her that he really wants to hangout and he would lie to me and say he is at work or working out. I have a gut feeling that youre too good for this guy anyway!!! 5 Signs, 5 Ways to Respond When Your Boyfriend Stops Texting, Are You in Love With a Married Man? I dont think these tips for knowing if your husband is cheating is stupid. He has destroyed all the trust I ever had in us as a couple and him as my husband. But I never felt that I was being cheated until 4 months ago. He plays poker as well and goes to the casino 2 times a week or every other week. 2 years ago he was checking my cell messages in the middle of the night during his affair with her. Required fields are marked *. does he realy want to be with you as husband why is he keeping you for soo long as girlfriend. how old is the kids to acept daddy is not with us? Don't get drawn into doing stuff you're not comfortable with. He says he has no idea how they got there. he knows i am extreamly suspicious on him and i think if does something he will make sure that he removes all the evidence. I hope you do. He explained that he wants a partner that is young, beautiful , intelligent , and that could support him while he starts a business. In general, if you suspect your husband is cheating, then he probably is. I cant find one because I have an iPhone and he has an android. I dont believe this crap for a second and I prayed on it. Its almost like he is bipolar *he is a marine and has been over seas* but that doesnt give him the right to drink or treat me like that. My story is a little different. The internal struggle , the tug of war between disgust-rage-pain-humiliation- rejection and fear- love- desire- want- need is enough to kill you. And most importantly stop accusing him and telling him everything you know. Reading posts that evaluate the male and females ability to be monogamous has always intrigued me, especially coming from a mans point of view and what kind of man it is coming from and his experience in life with women in particular is very interesting. I think of all what i read is reality and it happen i just want to share with others.anything of you want to do trust your instings and act ones. Which I expected. I just want out of all things lies and cheating. And he denied it completely. And the girl from the website i saw txt and emails *naughty pictures sent back and forth* and i did confront him about it because areound that time i found out i was pregnant. You would not do those things to him! Love yourself! I am truly sorry and know your pain I am going through divorce its hard as hell going back to school further my education moving to FL after divorce .. please take care of yourself and know your not alone hugs .. In June of 2010 a new Secretary was hired in his department. Good luck and be strong! But theres been a few times I have had a strong guy feeling he is cheating on me. He just three days ago tried to strange me because I wanted to be alone and all of a sudden, he has turned into this Angel who all of a sudden wants to kiss me, touch me etc.. What should I do?!!!!! Through the years I have heard many stories from co-workers about he and 2 of his close friends who chased women every weekend while in the bars, cheating over and over again. Perhaps your spouse chose to save a couple of the steamy ones for later playback. They do not speak to me and he doesnt introduce me to them. He didnt tell me all this while until after the phone call. I was very upset with my husband but he keeps telling me nothing happened whenever i bring it up but the story always changes. He was always on his phone . It sounds totally one sided and he sounds like hes treating you like crap. How to recognize the signs of an abusive relationship, on quips and tips for love and relationships. Im not sure if its emotionally or physically or if he has even cheated at all. Our bodies produce nourishment for our child. about 6 months of visits I got pregnant with our first child. Im not doing anything, but wonder if he is again. Only because his emails We have lots of it at home. If your wife is suspicious of you, its because you are behaving suspiciously. And no matter what happen dont tell him your source why you catch him so next time if ever it happen again you know what to do. If he can find a way to string three women along, so much the better!). I see him usually 1 week a month, sometimes 2. Last year july he told me that he was going on a fishing weekend with some guys from his work, i did not think it strange as he did that often. The points or theorys you have about men are some what true. What tracker did you use for his phone? I want to leave because I feel so angry of what he has done to me. He then told me he kissed her, put his hands up her shirt, and made out with her. I thought my relationship for great until I found out that he was sleeping with someone that he works with. It sounds like your father is an abusive man in a stressful situation, which is making him behave even worse than normal. An empty condom wrapper fell out of his bag and now i have a yeast infection. Now its been over a month and from the time we came back to his mothers house he was slowly treading away from staying in contact. I still love him but I cant forgive him. This is especially important as you might be wrong. I found that so disrespectful. i also foung his cell phone with very graffic details from the girl & ny husband. He gave her his email address. They found call logs, text messages and social media chats. pls help! My husband was the best coz he slept with this women on the day my daughter was really ill in hospital (it was the first u time she had become this ill) I was in another country and it was 2days after my daughters birthday. (I was raised from a Christian home with parents who are still together to this day.). Thank you for your thoughts on a lying, cheating husband! I wrote this to answer your question and another girl had the same question, so I answered her here, too: What Should I Do When I Suspect He is Cheating on Me? He became extremely aggressive and angry with me when I started accusing him of being way too involved with her. As a female I get sick and tired of other females male bashing. now he blames me for everything that goes wrong in his life,for instance about 2weeks ago he got the windscreen of his brand new car smashed by one of his girlfriends leading to a police case and guess who he blames? TRUST YOUR GUT AND PRAY THE HOLY SPIRIT WOULD REVEAL ANY DARKNESS TO YOU. My husband went to Las Vegas the weekend of November 9th November 12th. But when you say that when my husbands bestfriend is a cheater he has the tendency to cheat too, I am so afraid of that. I am not in love with him anymore and i am not attracted to him anymore. But people dont know what they have until its gone I will say that. Is your husband lying about cheating? He claims nothing is going on but i am worried something is going on. He has done a few things different in the bedroom, when I ask him about it he says he is just trying different things as to my reaction. He says he is looking for work, but has not had an interview at all in over 2 years. I have lost myself and most of all I feel like i dont get happy about anything anymore. He has started shaving (which he never did), brushing his teeth more, and showering at night and in the morning. The supply, putting people on pedestals, no empathy, no remorse, impulsive, full of shame, lack of responsibility , he is jealous of my accomplishments , envious, very envious and resentful. Hi I m married in 2009. v have a female child. I that affair started when I was pregnant and I found out when our son was 15 months old. I have to say I was in shock.
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